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No Complaining

No Complaining - Arc Integrated

No Complaining – Arc Integrated

I’m glad you’re here.  In the spirit of the time of year, I want to offer a gift, mixed with a challenge.  This idea is founded by Will Bowen of www.acomplaintfreeworld.org, details below.  The reason for this gift is that there continues to be more and more evidence to connect our thoughts, statements, actions and feelings to our overall experience of the world. This challenge offers the opportunity to consider our statements, if only for three weeks.   Basically, no complaining.   One strategy in tackling this seemingly insurmountable task, is practicing gratitude.   We all have much be thankful for.  Ok, I’ll start.  In this card you’ll find a few reasons why I am grateful to have you in my life.  I hope you find this gift intriguing and interesting enough to experiment with.

Love,

Michael

The paragraph above was the beginning of a card I wrote for about 20 members of my family as well as some other loved ones over a holiday season.  I wanted to take the opportunity to give back some gratitude and a chance to put some intention into action for the New Year.  I learned about this through A Complaint Free World, here is a video that is worth a watch about this project.

The basic idea is that you get a bracelet that stays on your wrist until you can sustain 21 days without complaining.  Every complaint means you switch wrists and the timer starts over.   According the website, they say that this experiment typically takes 4-10 months to complete! What a great opportunity to challenge ourselves!

We often hear about studies on changing our mindset, practicing mindfulness, being positive or other non-tangible pieces of advice.  While I am totally on board with the previous suggestions, I like this 21 day challenge because it has an activity attached to it, which I think helps to build the likelihood for success.  Whenever we are practicing a new way of thinking or feeling, there should be an associated new way of being or doing.

I was really thankful for my family’s response to this gift as it seemed very heartfelt and appreciative.  There were some tears shed, lots of joking and I think some added thoughtfulness about our individual attitudes and statements, which was my hope.

However, I don’t think that just passing out bracelets and offering the challenge would have been as meaningful without the added gratitude.  With every bracelet I gave I wrote a personalized note regarding why I was thankful to have each person in my life.  I believe that expressing gratitude as a part of this gesture was important because it was an example of how to pursue the task of – no complaining.

If you are reading this blog, then you most likely have everything you need. You have shelter, food/water and probably some people in your life that you care about or care about you.  There is much to be grateful for.  Expressing gratitude is one strategy in combating the pattern of complaining.

Care to experiment?  The next time you notice yourself complaining, see how this could be shifted into a statement of gratitude.  Alternatively, practice expressing gratitude more often and see if that shifts how much you are complaining.

Wishing you a prosperous, fun, challenging and growth filled year ahead!

Best,

Michael

 

P.S. If you are curious to learn more about personal development, effective workplace culture, dynamic leadership  and a wide variety of other topics, sign up today! www.arcintegrated.com/book.  It’s totally free.

You’ll also receive Chapter One (for FREE) from the upcoming book – CHANGES.  This book explores seven themes of sustainable change so that you can finally achieve the professional and personal goals you have been striving for but keep missing.

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The Importance of Gratitude

The Importance Gratitude

 

I was on a flight last week heading out to California for what I expected to be a very transformational conference, and it was.  I was excited to be going in the first place but returned with even more gratitude.  The conference was called – The Most Awesome Conference, and indeed it was.  It was put on by a group of savvy therapists, consultants and business strategists.  This conference was unique, not only did we get to hear presentations on important strategies of running a business but we got to participate in creating new ways to market, promote and manage our business.  The amount of connection and support I felt from this weekend conference was intense. I was reminded of the importance of gratitude.  It is with this gratitude that I continue to be propelled forward.

I would like to give thanks to the following people for putting together such a great weekend full of learning, laughter and action! A special thanks to – Joe Sanok of Practice of the Practice, Kelly & Miranda of Zynnyme, Dr. Julie Hanks, Jo Muirhead, Mari Lee of Growth Counseling, Ernesto  Segismundo of Fylmit.com, and all the wonderful attendees of The Most Awesome Conference!

I am so grateful to have had the opportunity to learn from them and to have had the chance to share ideas and explore how to build the field of counseling, coaching and consulting.

I reference this story for a few reasons –

  • It is important to me to be thankful.
  • Gratitude can improve our lives socially, psychologically, and even physically.
  • Gratitude impacts others, thus impacting the world!

Three reasons why expressing gratitude may be beneficial to you

  1. According to Robert Emmons, a leading researcher on gratitude, there are a number of benefits from offering regular gratitude including – stronger immune system, higher levels of positive emotions, more forgiving attitude and less feelings of isolation.
  2. Gratitude can have an impact on your relationships. According to John Gottman, a leading expert in marital relationships, it is very important for a couple to maintain a ratio of more positive interactions than negative, for the marriage to be successful.
  3. Gratitude has an impact on others around you. If you want to make a difference in how you interact with others, consider adding an element of gratitude. This shift in interaction style may have a great impact on your relationships and communication.  Others are more likely to respond to gratitude than discontent.

When I think of the times in my life that have been particularly challenging, one of the things that brings me back from feeling like nothing is working, is to be thankful for all that I have.   The truth is that when we cut out all the things we have from the things we need, most of us are richer than we think.

So the question at times may be – “What am I grateful for?”  This may be an easier or harder question to answer, depending on the day. However, just like everything, if you practice it becomes easier.  So, please see the following challenge –

Challenge of the Week!

  • Think of someone or something you are grateful for and why.
  • Express this gratitude by writing a small thank you message and tagging them via social media.
  • Share this post.
  • Move through the day with ease.

Thankfully,

Michael

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